I came to work today, went into my office and someone had taken away my supports for my computer screens. I have two screens, two places to view data and two places to see my work. I have the bases raised up about four inches so that I may see at eye level, but when I came in this morning someone had taken by away my supports and my screens were now at a lower viewing level and my perspective had been forcibly changed and I was really upset.
I did not want my view changed and I went off on a tear to find out who had taken my supports. As a walked down the hallways of the place of my employment, everything looked different and it was extremely troubling. The framework was there, the walls, floors, halls, rooms, but it was skewed.
I began to look for blocks, wood or anything I could prop my monitors up with, because there was no way I was going to view my work from that vantage point, but I could not locate anything to return my monitors back to the way they were before. It was so frustrating; I was like, “what the f… is going on here, why can I not find one prop for not even one of my screens”? I was beside myself, saying take “it easy, adapt, let it go and move on”, but was upset someone had taken away my angle for comfortable viewing.
I began to race around, up and down the halls, upstairs and downstairs, in the storage rooms and closets, but could not find a prop. I came back around to my office, but my office was gone. My desk was still there, but it was cleaned off. I think there was still a computer screen, but it was skewed; clean, but in a weird kind of way and my desk was right next to someone else’s and I was really pissed off.
The others were perfectly fine and were comfortable at work, but I was having trouble letting go of my space and my perspective. Then I targeted someone who was sitting a couple of spots over and began to give him a ration, but he said, “sorry, your props are gone and you will have to adapt to the revised vantage point”.
I was a meeting after that in a large conference room and was two seats removed from the head of the table. The boss was there and the room was filled. I had one person to my left and many people to my right, but the room was tight and the seat backs we all against the walls and I could not leave the room without disturbing the whole meeting. I began to panic and did not want to be sitting at that table and started to try to figure out how to get away.
The boss was speaking and taking care of business, but I was thinking that I have not finished my work. I have to get back to my work. I was not done, but was trapped in this conference room with all these people who I did not know and I was freaking out.
They all knew me and I was up toward the boss and he certainly knew me, but I did not know them. I kind of knew the boss, and the one to my left, but the others felt like strangers.
The meeting had something to do with business, but I was focused on my loss of perspective at my work station. I was really upset. I felt like George Costanza, from Seinfeld in the episode, where he was screaming, “you guys are killing independent George”.
It was done though and I could not find a prop for my monitor and was saddened by the new perspective. I went looking for the one, which I had targeted as the thief and found him in one of the rooms which were not offices anymore but living spaces, like a dormitory. I went into this guys room and it was militarized. His room was full of, knives, guns and all manner of weapons and I was upset.
Then I realized that he was in my home room. While I was away, this guy had come in and taken over my room. I was like, “what the f… is going on here”? He said, “you must be mistaken, this is not your room, it is my room”.
So I left, confused and began to scurry down the halls and floors trying to locate my room, but my perspective had been skewed and the halls were bent and I got confused and lost. It was apparent to me that I was being purposely misled and kept searching for my room.
I found it finally and that mother f..er was there and I knew it was my room he had taken over and I was really upset. He was all defensive with a knife in his hand and I told him, “I am not afraid of you”; ” I want my room back” and ” I am going to f..’n kill you if I do not get my room back”.
You know how, sometimes we have interactions with folks and we say we are not afraid, but really are? This was not one of those times. It was as if I was perfectly capable of taking back my home and was serious about its recovery.
I know how we are. Change our vantage point and skew our view and we eventually become comfortable with this perspective and it becomes seemingly, a straight view and we forget how it used to be and what it used to look like.
When the skewed become straight, then the straight will certainly feel askew.
Then it will be up to each and every one of us to choose a perspective; to keep the computer screens at a lower viewing level or to raise them back up to “I” level.
Yes, changing the angle at which we view our reality is going to hurt like a mother f…’r and the perspective is going to feel skewed, but this is not a new perspective is a true perspective, seen at “I” level and will feel straight and comfortable before too long.
It is a real son of a bitch, when we have to give up our vantage point, but I can assure you, that the lowering of our screens was done maliciously, with the thought that we would never push through the discomfort of raising up our screens.
I think the conference room came after my interactions with the maggot who stole my room, lowered my screens and skewed my perspective. It is really hard to remember which order the events took place.